This quote from Luke in the Bible resonated with me deeply at the end of 2022. If you're reading this post, you're probably like me in many ways:
1) Your work requires that you consider and serve others.
2) Your work is driven by passion and purpose.
3) Your work is often mentally, physically, and emotionally taxing.
On the good days, you feel fulfilled and driven by purpose. On other days...well...those days are challenging. On those days you feel defeated and ask yourself, "Am I truly making a difference?"
Then life happens, and amid it all you find yourself faced with your own personal tragedy -- the impending loss of a parent. If we're honest, parental relationships are often complicated. They become even more complicated when our parents age, become sick, and the person who was once caretaker is now in need of care. As a child, you saw them as superhuman. As an adult, you watch them become human. For over a year, I watched my mother’s health slowly decline as she fought (valiantly) a very rare form of cancer. In her final three months, I traveled to the Bahamas bi-weekly faithfully to sit at her bedside, stroke her hair and let her see me. At the end, she could barely communicate. The only thing worse than the pain of watching her decline was the onset of the physical pain that she was experiencing.
During it all, life continues for everyone else in the circles of your life not directly connected to your family. Day in and day out you struggle inwardly to maintain your composure, to continue to serve, continue to lead, continue to be husband, father, brother, and son. Then, in an instant, it's over and you realize, “If I'm not careful, I will lose myself.” At this moment, in the throes of your pain, you realize that you must now begin the long, arduous process of healing.
What follows are the internal struggles. You try to reconcile conversations you had…and the ones you should have had. You question your judgement, and you grieve in silence. When no one's looking, you cry deep passionate tears that cleanse your soul and settle the throbbing in your heart. Then you begin your process of healing. It is in these moments that you realize that YOUR purpose and YOUR calling hang in the balance of your healing. So heal...because you must.
In Love,
Jevon
Written by partner guest blogger Jevon Gibson, CEO, The Fulton-Dekalb Hospital Authority, and Principal Advisor, Community Health Solutions (CHS). CHS co-leads Resilient Georgia’s regional grantee coalition in Clayton county, the Aligning Community Systems for Resilience Initiative (ACSRI)